It didn’t mean anything
“If my husband carried on a relationship with a woman — took her out, saw her multiple times — and never had sex with her, I’d be crushed,” says Marilee, 26-year-old from New York. “But my husband didn’t do that. He had sex with one woman, one time in an isolated incident.”
Marilee is convinced that her husband’s affair didn’t mean anything and she hasn’t let it change their relationship. She forgave him in her heart and she doesn’t talk about it with him at all anymore.
“If you are going to take your husband or boyfriend back after he cheats, you can’t spend the rest of your life punishing him for it,” she explains. “I decided to let it go and forgive him. So I don’t harp on it. I’m not overly jealous or suspicious. Our lives are pretty much the same as they were before it happened.”
Truly let it go
Cheryl, a 32-year-old from Chicago, agrees with Marilee. “You have to truly let it go,” Cheryl says. “My husband got a blow job from a prostitute while on a business trip. He didn’t f–k her and it was just once. I didn’t have to find out about it — he called me the next day and told me.”
While many of us could never forgive such infidelity, these two women have found a way to move on and be happy.
“It was a mistake,” says Cheryl. “I considered leaving him. We don’t have kids. I have my own job and can certainly take care of myself. But I love my husband and I believe that he loves me.”
How did Cheryl manage to get over it?
“We didn’t go to counseling. There wasn’t a lot of screaming and yelling. I just thought about what was right for me and the answer was staying in the marriage. I don’t believe in the ‘once a cheater, always a cheater’ mantra.”
Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you?
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